(in order of writing)
La Salle d’Or – 83 pages. A student’s desire to ask a girl out turns into a pseudo-musical, world-shaking fiasco.
A Public Affair – 45 pages. Mickey wants nothing more than an affair with Eleanor, but she’s already having one!
How to Kill a Bloodthirsty Hermit – 35 pages. A struggling relationship finds new life through murdering a hermit and hiding the evidence.
Felix Hasselbury Gets a Job – 30 pages. A tainted celebrity improvises a commercial in hopes of a commission.
Mr. Nice Guy – 95 pages. D-list celebrity Mr. Nice Guy’s biggest fan lands a job with him, but only because Mr. Nice Guy is in lust with his wife.
Table Talk – 15 pages. A post-apocalyptic high school reunion.
Le Salty Dream– 23 pages. A bath salts salesgirl solicits a fantasy-prone chauvinist in hopes of meeting her quota.
Kiosked! – 25 pages. A different take on Le Salty Dream, in which the customer is the protagonist.
Bohemian Grove– 10 pages. A young man’s innocent wordplay triggers an economic collapse at a gathering of the world’s elite.
Model Behavior– 2 pages. Fashion models in an elevator.
MelonCally – 10 pages. An incorrectly-formatted rumination on how technology affects us.
Boob Job– 5 pages. A high-powered businesswoman uses her manservant as a bra.
Chance Meeting– 2 pages. Two friends run into each other on the street.
Booster Seat– 30 pages. A mysterious device stands between parents and their kidnapped child.
Ralph Fiennes Robs a Bank – 110 pages. Ralph Fiennes, the actor, decides to rob a bank. But why?
Buffet Flavor – 14 pages. Young romance, harmless experimentation, or aggressive assault? You tell me.
The Following is Based on True Events (from a Video Game) or Sim Story – 8 pages. Bob Newbie and Mortimer Goth catch up on recent life events.
Welcome Pie – 30 pages. A paranoid Irish immigrant thinks his new neighbors have come to kill his sister and him with a poisoned pie.
Poof! – 20 pages. The local superhero, Mr. Disappearerer has been steadily gaining notoriety. In similar proportion, Kathy’s boyfriend Donovan has been steadily more absent from their relationship. Could he be him?!
Dystopiapiapia – 34 pages. In this satiric take on our cultural obsession with dystopian female heroes, we follow the tale of Miley Cyrus, an oppressed Jupiterian miner fighting to reclaim her puppy. On her journey, she’ll train to infiltrate the upper echelon of society and yada yada yada. What follows is wholly predictable, contrived, and more fun than you can shake a pick-axe at!
Note: I enjoy utilizing characters in multiple plays, though never expect an audience to be familiar with their history outside an individual play. For example:
—The Quinton Qronicles: follows the life of Quinton as a secondary character. In La Salle d’Or he’s in high school, in A Public Affair he’s an adult, and in How to Kill a Bloodthirsty Hermit, he’s an old man.
—Felix Hasselbury appears chronologically in Felix Hasselbury Gets a Job, then Mr. Nice Guy.
—Ponopoly Volva appears in Mr. Nice Guy, then in both Kiosked! and Le Salty Dream.
—Mickey Magnus appears chronologically in Le Salty Dream, Felix Hasselbury Gets a Job (referenced), The Mickey (being written), and A Public Affair.